How do you think you are told by your boss like
“This document is very good. Well done. I really appreciate you. If you summarize this part more briefly, everyone can get your point more easily, I believe ” ?
Japanese people tend to simply receive this mention as complimentary from the boss. However, In the US, what the boss really wanted to tell you indicates the last sentence. “If you summarize this part more briefly, everyone can get your point more easily” means “Your document is way too complicated to understand. You need to fix the document right away as briefly as everyone can understand.”
Even if interpreting what the boss said this way, it is no exaggeration.
The previous 3 sentences, “This document is very good”, “ Well done”, “I really appreciate you” are just a communication buffer to avoid conflict.
If you were a boss, how could you request your subordinate to fix his/her document? If you request him/her in a brusque way like “This is really bad one. You just fix it right away,” you must be branded a worst non-professional manager.
In the United Sates, it is commonly thought as very rude attitude that a boss openly indicates negative feedbacks to his/her subordinates. When American boss gives his/her subordinates feedback, he/she needs to raise firstly 3 good points of the task to pay them a compliment enough and then take up the main questions or requests to them. This is really the common way to instruct people.
Even if the questions or requests are generally looked as negative indication, a boss need to indicate softly in a round-about way.
During discussion, when you take objection to an opinion that someone insist on, Japanese people tend to express directly “That is wrong!!”
However, this is how you must not be doing in the US companies.
“You have a point on this issue and especially, I agree on this point and I think there is also something you can figure out this way. ”
You firstly raise up the person’s good points and take roundabout objection to respect his/her position and thoughts at the same time.
At least, on the situation where people take objection to others, Japan has way too emotional cultural background. So this is why I think Japanese people are really bad at negotiating and fall behind in high level discussion in the world
Why Japanese people are so emotional to instruct someone
Please use your brain more correctly
You don’t even know something like that?
I told you that once before! Why can’t you do this?
This phrases are often used in Japanese office mainly by a boss to his/her subordinates. What do you think you are said like this way? It is pretty emotional way to push boss’s rightness to subordinates one-sidedly and peremptorily without trying to know their situation.
This feature can been seen very well in Japanese-style discussion
Japanese way of discussion is way more close to emotional argument and out of its essence. It is because discussion for Japanese people is had for the things that people have already come to conclusion. Therefore, in many cases, discussion is used to prove which one of opinion is correct in Japan.
Japanese way of discussion is not really the productive way to take in opinions from those who have different sense of value in order to create new ideas and to have wide views of various insistences but more self-justification way to think about how to win social support by confuting others and improving how correct opinions they have.
This phenomenon can be seen universally on SNS or Q&A websites.
People in the world have sense of values and thoughts based on their own justice and rules and what is right and wrong. This is pretty common sense that we have universally. But the problem is the majority of Japanese people take it for granted that their own justice and rules are normal in the world. “My justice is other’s justice.” “It is pretty natural that others will agree on my rightness and justice.” Japanese people have these premises in their deep mind.
Reading lines without a word is thought to be a Japanese virtue. This can be possibly a smooth communication if already understanding each other before telling what you want him/her to do. However, there is a premise without exception that Japanese have “expectation” that binds Japanese mind like he is supposed to be doing this for us and, it is natural for everyone to think this way. And in no-accepting objection atmosphere that is controlled by majority, people’s opinions are integrated by peer pressure and people share the similar opinions among themselves. That’s why Japanese people can understand someone’s request without a word. But this can never come into being diversity in Japanese society.
I think discussion is the one to lead to one conclusion of common ground that everyone can at least agree on as accepting diversity and objections. Goals of discussion is not to compete which insistence is more superior but keep learning better theory than yours beyond opinions conflict so it is no good to reject communication one-sidedly by denying what a person means to say as a premise but important to pay attention to tackling together with problems and contradictions generated after you accept the premise of opposite opinions.
And more important thing for Japanese people not to change discussion into emotional argument is credibility on each other.
When I observed Japanese discussion, I could realize they didn’t trust each other. “If I say something like this, I am made a fool of or maybe someone holds me back from my insistence or revenges on me” . Their mind is always full of worries of aggressive objection from others due to peer pressure so they are reading lines by telling noncommittal opinions to observe mental state each other. People are controlled by trivial emotional pride and discussion is always out of its essence. There is no active and unique opinions although people gather in discussion to show their unique opinions.